Yes my awesome computer has traveled back home from Texas and arrived home a day early. We were told we needed to send her there last week after a pop up message window opened following a loud noise. The window’s message read “CPU fan failed. Send your computer in for repairs immediately.”

In the last email we received from HP they said it was due here this Thursday. Needless to say I am soooo very excited. I don’t know what they found wrong, or if there was anything really wrong. In fact I don’t even know if they replaced any parts or did a complete system restore on her. My efficient, knowledgeable, and of course wonderful hubby did a ghost backup cd on her so that hopefully getting her back to working order with all the programs we had installed should be a piece of cake(mmmm…..cake….where?) and it won’t take too long to have her back up in running condition once again! As always I owe Jerry a huge debt of gratitude for keeping me with the a working computer at all times! Yes! and thank you sweetheart!

Serves-Plenty
Cook Time-Weeks

This is the ultimate high-tech I love to have it all recipe. Start with good-natured stock, preferably young people who are committed to a lifetime of companionship. Allow time for all ingredients to mature and grow before adding too many complicated and expensive items as this may make the stock bitter and tough. Top this recipe off with a large dollop of humility, patience and love.

INGREDIENTS

1 one story 3 bedroom 2 bath, 2 car garage house,

with unfinished attic

1 happy to be empty nesters married couple, photo of your choice:

1 HP Desktop Computer: Dual Processor, 2GB memory, 300GB harddrive, just under 2 years old, still under warranty:

DIRECTIONS

Set aside 1 one story 3 bedroom 2 bath house and married couple for now.

To 1 HP desktop dual processor computer add:

1 22″ HP sleek adjustable Tinkerfied screened monitor

1 My Book terrabyte external hard drive

Set 1 HP Desktop Computer aside for now.

To attic in 1 one story 3 bedroom 2 bath, 2 car garage house add;

To 1 one story house with unfinished attic add appointment for inspection and cleaning of heating and cooling ducts.

Upon completion of noisy and dirty duct inspection and cleaning of heating and cooling ducts, wait.

(Recipe Note* As with any recipe posted on this site please note: With entry to crawl structure spaceways comes the risk of disturbances, which may result in unpleasant and smelly outcomes. We here at pitterpat can in no way be held responsible for any such outcome.) If such outcomes do occur when following this recipes guidelines please do the following:

To 1 one story 3 bedroom 2 bath, 2 car garage house with unfinished attic add one complete attic inspection:

Upon completion of the total attic inspection which may or may not have resulted in total personal emersion of unpleasant and smelly outcomes and which can in no way be the responsibility of pitterpat’s recipe or any affiliation of pitterpat or subsequent companies who may hold or join her in marriage, the following products are to be used only as a suggestion to the remedy of said outcomes.

After adding the above recommended products, stir often, then wait 3 to 4 days.

As often happens when adding odd and seemingly unconnected products to any intelligent and highly technical recipe multiple problems can occur all at once, resulting in unpleasant odors, unexplained coincidences, unmentionable expletives and multiple late nights. These incidences most often will happen without notice, after all monies are paid and in some but not all cases, stated warranties have run their course.

That said, this is what one of the multiple problems and unexplained coincidences can look like:

Upon inspection of this recipe ingredient it was determined the 1 My Book terrabyte external hard drive had an expired expiration date, or in other terms, was no longer working, after of course all monies were paid and stated warranties had run their course.

Additionally what may appear to be 1 failed portion of the recipe will sometimes present itself as a BOGO or two for one problem, with the 2nd failed portion shown here (click picture to enlarge):

To address this portion of the failed recipe it is recommended you bring in an expert Head Chef in the field, as allowing spouses…..errr……the Chef In Training to closely inspect the ingredients may result in further damage…..ummm….a failed recipe.

Finally, turn all cooking, stewing, cursing and mulling over to Head Chef.
Wait.
Taste for doneness.
Season as needed.

Serve if desired, or refer to Head Chef notes, seen below:

Head Chef Notes:

Pictures of discussed 1 happy to be empty nesters married couple follow this report.

New recipe ingredients ordered:

1 HP desktop dual processor computer return box
1 new Buffalo brand terrabyte external hard drive ordered

Recipe Diagnosis:

Head Chef – 1 diagnosis of flu – recommendations: bed rest, aspirin, patience
(Head Chef faking looking healthy for photographer AKA Chef In Training and owner of 1 HP Desktop Computer )

Chef In Training – recommendations: phone Dr – diagnosis – Bronchitis – RX medication needed
(Chef In Training not faking looking sick and missing terribly her 1 HP Desktop Computer!)

Head Chef Additional Notes:

HP states 1 HP Desktop Computer: Dual Processor, 2GB memory, 300GB harddrive still covered under warranty, upon receipt will access situation, repair, and return ASAP

French Vanilla Air Filter removed from return AC filter and thrown in garbage. No plans to purchase more in the future.
Odor Eliminator Charcoal remains in attic, no ill effects noted at this time.
Oust Clean Air candles used and found to be effective.

Unpleasant and smelly outcomes otherwise known as unfound deceased rodent in attic odor ceases to exist at present time.

Total attic inspection with cleaning of heating and cooling ducts appear to be effective in cutting down on dust and allergies (with exception to above mentioned deceased rodent episode) as well as significant improvement in air flow and reduced noise in ducts.

End of Head Chef notes.
Signed Out.
End.

Monday started out like this…..woke up to my 8:26am alarm, which I set so I could say goodbye to my sweet hubby before he headed off to work. I end up staying in bed until he comes and kisses me goodbye and I fall back asleep, too tired to even think about getting up. Wake up a second time at 9:30am and realize it feels like only a minute has gone by instead of an hour. I decide to get up and first things first go turn on the coffee pot. Second, eye drops, thyroid pill, potty stop. TMI, I know. Get over it.

Another trip out to the kitchen to heat up my coffee mug using the hot water spikit we have. Back to the bedroom and I turn my heating pad on and position it in my computer chair so I can get my back warmed up in hopes of getting a bit more limber before I have to move around much. My 3rd trip to the kitchen and I get my coffee and plop down at the computer to read email, the news, check out my friends websites, etc. I usually sit at the computer with my first cup of coffee for about 1/2 hour, then I either get my second cup or I get breakfast depending on how my tummy feels. Today it’s 1 cup of coffee followed by a bowl of cereal and then a phone call to our local trash company to schedule a pick up of our old spa cover.

After my cereal I start to get my head in gear and somehow my body follows. I brush my teeth, clean my face, look in the mirror and try to decide if I am going to apply a lot of makeup or just go out commando. (In this case that does not apply to no underwear). I decide on just foundation and a quick brush of my hair. I change my clothes, and gather my belongings to get ready to go to the gym. This routine usually takes a while because now that I’m 55 I need to check and triple check if I have everything before I head out the door. Just kidding. I only check twice.

My purse is loaded, the small hand carry ice chest is packed with ice, a piece of string cheese, and water for my trip out. Before I leave the house I check that all windows and doors are locked up and both phones are on the charger if needed. I also check if the lights are out and that I have the house keys. Told you I double check.

Load everything into the car and try to back out with an obstructed view because my neighbor once again has to have his I-have-a-small-weeny-so-I-need-a-big ass-truck-to-prove-I-am-a-man parked so that half in his mom’s driveway and half in the street. Oh and blocking the entire sidewalk, but that’s another story.

I make 1 stop at our local library used bookstore to see if they any good used books I can’t live with out. Get slightly annoyed because a lady decides she has to park her car in backwards and takes 5 turns to get it right. Okay, she only takes 3, but WTH?! I grab a few good free books and hear the gym calling me. Wish I could ignore it.

Make it to the gym, through the door and start looking for my ID badge which is not in it’s usual place in my purse all the while talking to Chris, one of the managers there as well as another young (hell, everyone’s young when you’re this old!) girl who’s working the computers. Try to swipe my debit card, once again showing my age gosh-damit and continue digging through my purse and telling Chris I’ve been coming 2 times a week and I wondered where HE was. That should stop his questioning whether I’ve been in lately. Try to swipe my Lake Mission Viejo badge while Chris tells me they won’t take that either and the young girl says “Why don’t you give me your last name and I’ll check you in that way”, which I agree to but still decide to find my ID badge. I get logged in thanks to the girl whom I need to ask her name on Friday, when she says “Let me check and see if someone turned it in. You might have dropped it.” Now I’m feeling insulted and truly old so I quickly come back with “Oh no, it’s in here somewhere I just used it.”, only to have her quick as a whip pull it out of the “old people who’ve dropped their badges box” and say “I thought so!!” Great. She also offers to put a clip on it which I hate but agree to because she was so nice.

Now that that whole rigamarole is taken care of I grab a towel and head towards the treadmill. I change the channel to HGTV and start my 30-45 minutes of walking at a regular pace for 3 minutes, super fast for 1 minute. You try doing that for long. It’ll make you wish you never got out of bed.

Once off the treadmill I drag my sweaty body to get a floor mat and start my stretching. 15 minutes later and I’m so glad to be leaving. With my ID badge and maybe my dignity since neither Chris or the young girl are anywhere to be found.

Trader Joes is busy, but I get through the store pretty quick carting my 2 recyclable grocery bags with me. I gather veggies, a bit of protein, half and half for my coffee, and a few other edibles up to the checker. I love this store for it’s great prices, great food and friendly atmosphere. Plus I get an additional work out for this old body while I carry the bags to my car. Always love it when I can multi-task!

Once home I get busy cooking: soft scrambled eggs with cut up low fat chicken sausage for this weeks breakfast, crash potatoes for Jerry’s dinner, cajun salmon for my dinner, and fresh steamed and seasoned veggies for both of us. He’ll cook his meat when he’s ready to have dinner. Everything’s put in tupperware, then the fridge, and I clean up the kitchen nice and shiny. Love my granite countertops!

Next is me time. Sort of. I change into comfy at home clothes, open the new spa cover lid 1/2 way and soak my tired feet and knees for 10 minutes, then gather photos that have patiently been stacked on my desk waiting to be put into our albums, some sticky tape and a glass of diet homemade lemonade. Ahh! Dam that bed feels good. The computer screen is positioned towards the bed and I lay there for quite a while watching TV and remembering events through the photos as I put them in the albums.

I end up chatting with 2 girlfriends, 1 local and 1 in Illinois for a total of almost 1.5 hours during this rest time. My girlfriend in Illinois’s basement flooded due to Ike’s wide path. More TV followed by saying hello to my hubby when he came home. I eat dinner around 6:30, then rest more until he eats. We watch The Closer finale while he eats dinner, I eat pineapple, then clean we up the kitchen.

My sweetie plays Wii and shouts out his wins while I finish painting the last small area of the kitchen…Yeah! I’m Done…a beautiful turqouise color. I wash out the brushes and put everything back, including helping my helpful hubby rehang the plate rack we took down so I could paint.

More Wii playing ensues while I go out into the spotlight lit back yard to fertilize our long row of cypress trees. 2 garden hoses have to be connected to get the length, the fertilizer bottle has to be filled and the hose end has to be hoisted up over the fence to the side yard. The gate lock is frozen shut. Thus the spotlit hoisting over the fence gate. 1 frozen gate lock is good to keep out neighbors. Doesn’t work too well for possums, raccoons or other animals. Oh well.

Walking through several large spider webs between the cypress trees and the house I muffle my screams in the night because I don’t want to disturb the neighbors so late. I’m in the “garden-zen-mode while I fertilzie. Then more hoisting the hose back over the fence, turn the water off and finally shuffle back into the house. The Wii games have ended, I haven’t found out the final score but I’m sure he still retains his bronze or pro status, reminding me I need to get in there and Wii myself up a bit!

Now for bed. Makeup off, brush the teeth, pj’s on. No need to look in the mirror, nothings changed anyway. The bed becons. Loudly. End of a Monday. Tuesday will follow with more exciting day-in-the-life-of adventures. For sure.